Appearance Discrimination

Luis Candelaria
Acts of Resistance
13 March 2020

“Appearance Discrimination”

          The topic that I choose for the project is appearance discrimination because not only has socierty have made prejudical judgements based on someone’s sex, race and religion; but also makes judgements just by how someone looks in general. I’ve chosen the topic specifically because it reflects on my own hardships as a heavy-set male diagnosed with the inflammatory disorder, lymphedema. Despite my skill-set level and motive to assist others, the leg has not only held me back physically in terms of walking at times, but also mentally for various reasons. I was often ridiculed because of the weight difference from my left swollen leg and my normal right leg. I was not only poked fun at for it but was accused of being unhygienic as a result of the dead tissue breakouts and that being fat was the cause of my swollen leg, which neither is the case. This hindered my ability to make connections or find future opportunities for myself. It also gave me some self doubts about myself. But I had to learn to brush those feelings off, release my emotions in some sort of outlet such as my artistic abilities and motivate myself to keep trying. The hard work paid off and I was able to manage not only secured employment but make many connections along the way. This serves as a set-goal example on how it’s been helping me achieve my professional interests. I never let the negativity of those unfair judgements get to me, and was dedicated to my craft, allowing me to pursue my career even further. Many people I’ve worked with only merely judged me for my skills; not particularly on my leg. This will play perfect for my portfolio as my goal is to initiate a series of paintings that depict ridicule, upbringings to get past them and open advice to overcome these struggles. I wish to spread my experiences of being judged and showcase any ideas for people who are suffering on the same boat. Here’s an example of a WIP sketch of a painting I’m developing:

Although she’s not a particular visual artist, one artist that influenced my project was the known model Maegan Bernard, whom my mother shared information on her with me online.

Maegan was diagnosed with lymphedema during her middle school years. The constant teasing by her schoolmates influenced her to not only hide but become suicidal. (https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-3437063/Agony-aspiring-model-3-LITRES-excess-fluid-leg-managed-hide-boyfriend-Bizarre-condition-left-24-year-old-suicidal-desperate-liposuction.html) It wasn’t until she became more open, especially revealing the condition to her partner after so many years, that her depression faded away and became more comfortable with the way she looks. Despite these setbacks, she still continues her job as a model and her photographs are marvelously dynamic with great poses. My leg may be bigger than hers but she still had the guts to come out and not be afraid of anyone destroying her self-esteem.

Unfortunately, many of my inspirations come from known animators and comic book artists; most of which followed an easy-settling path without a struggle. However, I can discuss about 2 direct influences on my work personally that helps emphasize my idea, and 3 other artists whom experiences had a great impact on the message I’m trying to convey. The first artist I wish to discuss is comic book and animation artist Milton Knight.

Milton Knight’s work was heavily inspired by Golden Age cartoons and not only worked as an illustrator and comic book artist since the 70s, but later became involved in animation as a storyboard artist and animator working on titles such as “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog”, “Ralph Bakshi’s Cool World” and “The Twisted Tales of Felix the Cat”. Milton is African-American and was recently involved in a hate crime involving a racist bystander. The man repeatedly shouted a slur at him and he responded with a vulgar gesture. (https://www.animationmagazine.net/people/animation-artist-milton-knight-victim-of-hate-crime-assault/) This escalated into a brawl between the two, and towards the end, Milton successfully pressed charges and the culprit was incarcerated. This is evidence on how our society is still populated with racial prejudice as Milton was immediately judged for his race and his life was at risk from it. Milton was also diagnosed with PTSD and lived in a terrible condition in his apartment due to his pack-rat tendencies and his limitations, and as a result, was at the verge of eviction. (https://pasadenaweekly.com/struggling-artist-is-evicted-after-complaining-about-living-conditions-at-his-altadena-home/) The judgement was apparently purely based on a combination of the difficulties repairing the building but despite the fact that Milton pays rent on time, it’s also the fact that he’s an elderely person; which made for him debating the eviction more difficult. A compromise could have been made based on Milton’s conditions but the landlord was completely unreasonable all because of Milton’s appearance, disability and race. This actually reflects me on the time when my landlord was being unreasonable to my mother when we lost our apartment.
Another influence on my work was the quadraplegic cartoonist John Callahan.

Before being payalyzed, Callahan had a hard childhood dealing with issues of abandonment and belonging, and as such used alcohol as an outlet (https://www.wweek.com/culture/2018/07/18/cartoonist-john-callahan-was-offensive-hilarious-and-one-of-portlands-own-now-gus-van-sant-and-joaquin-phoenix-are-giving-him-his-long-delayed-close-up/). But the situation changed the moment he had the car accident at age 21. He began developing cartoons and comics despite having limited mobility in his upper-body. They were crude in design but had the charm and humor that backed it up. Callahan’s sense of humor and heartwarming style led others to see him beyond the wheelchair and it opened the door for many more opportunities up to his death. One of his known works was an animated series entitled “Pelswick'' which focused on a young boy in a wheelchair. That was one of the few shows I always enjoyed during my childhood. Callahan’s work not only pokes fun of his own limitations in a lighter note but has caught the attention of known artists such as William Steig. It shows that if you're dedicated and persistent in what you love, you can follow your path.

World renowned actress Kathy Bathes is also in the same boat as me; struggling with lymphedema. Initially diagnosed with breast cancer in 2012, Bathes was treated with double mastectomy. But the result led her to gain fluid buildup in both of her arms, thus her lymphedema diagnosis (https://www.survivornet.com/articles/actor-kathy-bates-says-even-holding-up-a-book-is-hard-due-to-lymphedema-after-breast-cancer-surgery/). Although her condition is not as bad as her breast cancer diagnosis or other patients she came in contact with, she still suffers from an inability to lift heavy objects and gets occasional pain from time to time. My aunt also has lymphedema in her arms too, and she is in constant pain whenever her arms get vulnerable damaged. Reading about her struggles reminds me of the time when me being openly public about my condition lifted my aunt from her depression. She was feeling sorry for herself because of her condition and even stopped making YouTube videos until I told my story, which led her to think positive and be more optimistic. Bates’ has that similar path by helping others in need, which eased her journey. She’s currently working hard to raise awareness and create networks to help others who are suffering from it. I look forward to any more opportunities that could help decrease the pain in my condition.

           To my perspective, the earliest memory I have of a known figure who went through the same struggles as myself, among others, is famous runner and athlete Wilma Rudolph. Rudolph contracted polio at a young age after a long battle of in between pneumonia and scarlet fever, which resulted in her left leg to be paralyzed (https://timeline.com/wilma-rudolph-broke-barriers-and-expectations-when-she-won-the-olympics-c3e5de2d412). Wilma and her family were also not only poor, but they were also African-Americans living in a segregated world at the time. Despite the setbacks, Wilma was very interested in sports and was later signed into a track team at the 1956 Melbourne Olympics and won bronze medals. Although set for the United States’ first Olympics in 1960, her track coach advised against it on the account that women, especially mothers whom Wilma had become at the time, were never depicted to be athletes. But Rudolph was still determined, and thanks to arrangements made by her coach, was able to compete and became the first American woman and athlete in general to win three gold medals with several world records for each event. Wilma had three setbacks regarding her background and appearance, but Wilma’s love for track and dedication led her to gold and glory.

           The final artist whom I also found out and known his work for years was NJ native Kevin Smith, known for being the man behind the Clerks film. On February 13, 2010; Smith was escorted off a Southwest Airline flight due to complaints from the staff about his weight (https://abcnews.go.com/WN/kevin-smith-fat-fly/story?id=9837268). Staff commented on how despite his two seat purchases, his weight was considered a “safety risk” for the plane. Smith did not take his eviction lightly and tweeted on social media about his experience (https://twitter.com/thatkevinsmith/status/9079110598?lang=en). The airline managements’ response didn’t help de-escalate the situation as well, and this resorted not only for The National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance to call a boycott against the airline but Smith later made a published book about said experience. Smith is also currently an ambassador for the weight-loss company “Weight Watchers” (https://nj1015.com/fat-man-no-more-njs-kevin-smith-a-weight-watchers-ambassador/). I’m not an expert in airplane engineering, but I am certain that Smith’s weight won’t necessarily cause a risk of the flight attendant’s safety. I believe that their decision was purely judgemental on the account that he purchased two seats for himself. This is one of the primary examples on why I wouldn’t travel by plane. I would probably risk getting the same humiliation as Smith did. I support his tweet against the backlash he got and wish him luck on his weight-watching endeavors.

          To this date; there are only two projects that have reflected on me based on my discussion. The first is the infamous poem “To This Day” by Shane Koyczan (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltun92DfnPY). It was a beautiful representation on discrimination. On the video, Koyczan talked about his brief childhood experience, the hardships anyone would have to go through based on their look and their past, and motifs to show that they shouldn’t let those vibes get to you. I want to be able to convey those messages to others; show them that they can express their inner feelings and accomplish their destiny without letting their looks hold them back.

            The second project is the novel “Push” and it’s film predecessor “Precious”. The main character, Precious Jones, suffers through several hardships such as getting raped with a newborn child, struggling both educationally and financially, living under the guidance of a temperamental abusive mother, and being both African American and overweight (https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=120176695). But Precious’ determination for a good education to be a great mother to her children helps her bypass those tall ladders. Even when her mother tries to foil her ways, Precious still stood in her ground in order to live a happy and healthier life for her family (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CekWztEL504).
              From all of my influences and my own personal experience, I want to use my visual skills and artistic prowess to share the hardships and optimistic values of appearance discrimination. With the use of visual aids, people will get a glimpse on the experiences that I’ve faced, may take it as a new perspective for themselves and would even take head of my advice. When I look in the mirror and I see my leg, I don’t see it as an obstacle. I see it as a kickstarter to share my views and struggles with the world, and as an opportunity to strive hard and improve in my craft. The world may not be all black and white but if you remove the barrier goggles whenever you look at someone, we can paint the entire world in color.